just do him I won't tell jon
um i'm guessing you meant to send this to tina, thanks for the support in our relationship you whore
it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
operation harelip BJ is a go
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
apparently i'm the only person who has heard from her since saturday. she texted me "burt reynolds" at 2am sunday
He finally delivered on the dick pic, and Jesus Christ, it was worth the wait.
I would like to formally reclaim my title of a turn up queen.
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He told me he was cooking me a special dinner tonight. His "five star meal" was popcorn in champagne glasses, and chic fil a sauce in jello shot containers to dip the popcorn in. He still tries to convince me he doesn't smoke weed anymore.
I didn't have anyone to cheers so I tapped my beer on your fish tank... a little too hard
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
I swear he is my soulmate. He kept feeding me goldfish while we were fucking. Who wouldn't enjoy that while having sex.
A true gentleman never tells. But yes, I did indeed get laid last night
You started singing Baby Shark, screamed you have no idea how it goes, then somehow turned the beat into Bohemian Rhapsody
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