Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
my ass hurt today after the party last night. I wnt to the doctors and they found a coin in a ziplock bag with a note from you. WHAT THE FUCK DID U DO TO ME???
Sometimes I kiss girls just to make them shut up.
I'm sorry for coming into your work place and trying to smuggle you out in my purse.
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
Today my mom told me "that's what worries me about you getting blacked out drunk... You don't look pretty"
And then he tried to clean the throw up off my pants with 409
we should probably just go check in at the police station right now
Apparently from about 3-5AM I was consoling that crying stripper about her life choices.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
I was giving him a handjob in the woods and a family walked by
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
I cant tell you how much harder a belt makes hoeing
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