I think scott just propositioned me for sex
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
we took turns throwing up in the kitchen sink last night...no i am not doing the dishes
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
I'm making you a bingo card for hookups of the school year 2011-12 so you can make even worse life decisions next year
Ha, I bet. You tipped the waitress like 10 bucks for a glass of water.
Thanksgiving Shitshow: My grandparents found me passed out on the bathroom floor wearing nothing but a scarf made of toilet paper
I found him down the block clinging to a light post laughing and crying because a house "looked like it had buck teeth"
The orgasm outlasted the Charlie horse. Pros and cons.
I'm at the point where I'm gonna write in my mothers bday card. Happy birthday. Please stop having sex with the door open.
Like we just had a bunch of sex and then he threaded my eyebrows in bed lol. It was amazing
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
ALL I WANT IN MY MOUTH IS A GLORIOUS COCK SMOTHERED IN CHOCOLATE. DICK AND CHOCOLATE; IS IT TOO MUCH FOR A GIRL TO ASK FOR?!
Straight boys are literally imbeciles. If Darwinism doesn’t get them female rage will.
Randomize
