I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I swear she didn't look like that last week.
I just found glass in my funny face pancakes, there's nothing funny about that.
No, I'm never going to get a job bc I don't know anything about public relations except that Chris Crocker wants everyone to leave Britney alone.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i think i have weasels eating my brain. Also there is a skeleton staring at me from the back of the bathroom door. it's an awkward vomit. come find me please
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
As the night goes on these shots are getting so much easier. My liver jst needed a warmup lap.
I think he is probably a psycho that will eventually murder me but i mean the sex last time was AWESOME.
So I just went to 3 different stores because there is no way I can walk out of one store with this many reeses and still have my pride.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Go to hungover. Go directly to hungover. Do not pass go. Do not collect 200 dollars
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
Great. I broke up with him before he could like my selfie, now I'm down a like.
all i remember is slapping you in the face with a slice of pizza while laughing maniacally.
What's the best day of the week to potentially find out you're pregnant with your ex's baby?
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
Randomize