What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
that was after you ironed the burrito. didn't leave much cheese on the ironing board though
I don't know how I'm boarding the plane tomorrow. I have my car registration.
I think I sprained my soul last night
We definitely need to avoid these "I'm gonna get stabbed if I stay here any longer" partys
I CAME HOME WITH MY NIPPLES PEIRCED! WE WERE CAMPING. IN THE MOUNTIANS. I DONT EVEN REMEMBER IT AT ALL.
As I was throwing up blood I assured concerned onlookers that I had simply "eaten a lot of ketchup today"
Who knows. I'd probably only get a makeout with an OTPHJ from her so the return on sexual investment from her isn't looking that great.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Young lesbians are the worst. And also what got me through high school, sooooo
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
Currently on my Sunday walk of shame. Should I go to church?
He showed up completely drunk with a 30 of PBR and ten cans of Spam. I like this kid.
I sent him a blank text because I didn't want to "drunk text" him.
Randomize
