I remember going home with 2 girls. Woke up with 4.
no, he came in my armpit
I am at The Loft in SoNo, and there are two girls within arms reach that are making out with each other AGGRESIVELY. Like I can see 100% of a boob
For future reference, this is Trevors little sisters phone now. Trevs number is 484 XXX XXXX. Great story tho
and i looked up. we had an audience...
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
when he pulled his cock out I told him he'd brought a knife to a sword fight
Apparently I told a girl last night, that's she's super beautiful and I don't want to fuck she just deserves being eaten out
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I drank, I fought, I made my ancestors proud.
And then someone hit me with a pool cue
I just tried to pay for a coffee with a dollar and a necco wafer.
Just got a 200 dollar safe, two jars, and a 500 pack of rubber bands.. This doesn't SCREAM drug dealer does it?
...you should fill the cart some more
I seriously need to grocery shop. I have a slice of cheese, and alcohol.
I have never thoroughly inspected the geometry of my nipples until now. How do I fix this?
Sending out old nude selfies with the message "#tbt"