when does round two start
I don't know, I gave up bartenders for lent
it was all good till he told me to dance slow and quiet
just bought miller high life, hungry man dinners, and a bottle of lube. you win life, you win.
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
This dude is being a total douche
Just because it's Christmas Eve does not mean the liquor store has to give you a free bottle of peppermint schnapps
There's going to be a pool, lightsabers and alcohol. What could go wrong?!
His new job just became new places to have sex at.
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
And I must've sleep walked to the fridge cause when I woke up, there I was, balls deep in a fudge pop.
Where you at? Come home and endure this shit show called "The Second Presidential Debate".
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize
