No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
I am sitting here. Drinking from a bottle of vodka. Eating shredded cheese from a bag and waiting on him to pick me up after he finishes with his girlfriend. This is what dreams are made of.
Except there is my pee all over the walls now
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
Also, I'm going to TRY and be casual this weekend, but really, we need to be serious about equally dividing our time between party and bullshit.
Happy meals everywhere. I think Ronald McDonald Claus visited.
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
He won a jackpot and invited his ex girlfriend over to have sex on 5grand
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
It's one PM on a Saturday and I'm sitting here drinking Jack, eating a block of cheese and playing Minecraft. Please tell me you can come drag me to a bar.
I'm not gonna swipe right, he has better hair than me. Just no.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
but like who hasn’t gotten fingered at the state fair?
The last time we went to a costume party, you walked around in a loincloth with a cross and said you were Jesus. I'm eager to see how much more offensive you can be.
Randomize
