haha you were like: "I don't want to uh pressure you.." as you took your own shirt off
I wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commercials.
if i dont get laid while im dressed as Tim Tebow, i'm just staying true to the costume.
dude ... she has a full length mirror in her shower, don't even tell me shes not dtf
I don't remember her name, all I remember is trying to suck the wedding ring off her finger.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
coming from the girl bound and determined to pee in the snow
why would you restrict a girl of that
I fingered her though her window because she couldn't leave
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
Must say, as a couple, she and I are thrilled that our pretend lesbianism has paid off.
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
I continue to impress myself. Also I'm probably pregnant
Randomize
