3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
Just mixed Baileys and yoohoo. I feel like an alchoholic 2nd grader.
shes on the floor puking and texting simultaneously.
You kept whispering, no one does me like Jimmy Johns does me.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
judging by my wet hair I would guess I showered at the bartenders apt last night?
I'm not sure if you saw my recent facebook update, but I have already put the Radio Flyer wagon to good use. I had someone pull me to the nearest bar.
I owe you cheese. The drunk munchies don't acknowledge food ownership.
Made out with a mannequin all morning in cpr training, so im ready to party
My phone just said I texted someone at 430a and said let's fight. Then I texted them an hour later and said thanks.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Randomize