nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
I just realized that the music from spongebob is also used in real sex HBO.
i jus got home and totaly forgot i had nut all over the back of my shirt
..im mad u rememberd about that
please dont let the old guy in the wheelchair see you when you wake up
I was in the freezer we were knocking over shit. Speaking of which i asked my boss. I can hook up with girls in the freezer
Yeah just sayin. Whenever you want to come over and wank me off you can
i hope youre ready for a shit show because we just ordered a whole pitcher of red headed sluts
I'm supposed to be studying for finals but all I can think about is blowing him on a sea doo this summer
My middle name is suave and my vagina shoots rainbows, what else would you expect?
When Vanessa's kindergarten teacher called me in because she was caught with her hand down some boys pants in the bathroom, I knew you babysat last week.
For future reference. Do not congratulate the bar tender at oscars she is not pregnant she has just gotten fat u will get a shot thrown in your face
Definition of cool: he wants a back tattoo of three horses running through a "paisley explosion"
How did he even become this person? Like what drugs has he done??
We were fucking in the boat on the lake when another boat saw us and honked their appreciation.
Lmao a dude who just got out of prison said im worth 10 cigarettes in prison...I think that's a compliment
Good, I've got all this booze. It's intimidating to be in the room alone with it..
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