were having a shit on karen session at work but then she walked in so we used code names instead and she tried to join in like she knew them
This is a dangerous game of "whose life is more pathetic".
We had sex and then he fed me pie. This is the best friends-with-benefits situation ever.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I may or may not juuuust be reaching the point where I find some humor from waking up in the parking lot at the standard.
i'm pregaming while finishing a paper on cardio myocyte contractility in mice. i'm kicking finals week's ass right now
No longer allowed at circus circus apparently fuvking in the elevator is frowned upon.
After he finished going down on me he came up from under the covers, threw his hands into the air and shouted "take that lesbians!" and finished with "and we have dicks!"
People around me are just doing lines of cocaine. Like its no big deal. And I'm just here like.... Y'all want some cheezits?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bartering with my concussed boyfriend to eat food with blowjobs
So apparently someone caught him as he was falling. And carried him around the rest of the night.
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Can we make 2014 the year of no unsolicited dick pics?
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
he just left the suite without pants on wrapped in Christmas lights
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