so i texed my mom when i was trashed last night and said "i know its 3 am, just go to bed and i'll be back by the time we leave for the airport"
drug dealer added me on facebook, win ?
omg no way im finding him!
he has no pics of his face, and im always drunk so i cant remember if hes cute or not, but he told me im in his phone as "party girl" which is fitting i guess cause im dragging my hungover ass to buy preggo tests, and i had to get the cheap ones cause i blew all my cash on coke.
16 and pregnant actually makes me really happy that i'm gay
Does transporting jello shots count as driving with an open container?
Its trashy in the best of ways. Like a stripper working to pay for college.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
I decided to have standards now that i've graduated. No guys without a bed frame.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
You bought champagne and told everyone it was because I'd just found out I was pregnant. How exactly is that being a good wingman?
Hungover and I may throw up in my therapist's office. Maybe he is right about my drinking
This is a great bar, except you can't even randomly burst into song without them assuming you're drunk and cutting you off.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Its just akward. Everytime he tells me he loves me, I have to respond with, I love having sex with you. and he just stares at me in amazement
Looks like it rained condoms in my room last night
I'm shrooming way too hard to deal with your bullshit at this particular point in time
Randomize
