That's the secret to virgins: blizzards.
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
I learned nothing from that class except drinking and chemistry go together great.
she said "the two best ways to sober up are to nurse someone or give a blowjob" and im gonna go along with it.
That's what you said about that spiderman stripper, but look how that turned out
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
Was it high me or sober me who put those Jolly Rancher sticks in the freezer? I'd be soooo impressed if it was high me.
I sent him a naked picture of me with the caption "I lost at beer pong, this was a dare. Hope your nights going as good as mine" I've never talked to him in my life, this is a strange way to start.
i was completely deserted.. so i stood outside starbucks for 20 minutes trying to convince the employees to open early and take care of me.. fuck you guys
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
It is unclear if my flaming esophagus is hangover induced.
Steve watched craig and I have sex from the top level of his cat tower this morning.
Appreciate the offer but I'm a huge fan of penis
Update: He still has devil magic genitals.
So many people have told me I have great tits tonight, I'm unstoppable
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