dude! the alphabet song and twinkle twinkle little star are like the same tune
what drug did you take to come to that conclusion??
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
You're just telling me nice things because you came in my eye.
Ah, I knew it wouldn't be long before my boobs were introduced into the conversation.
just had to make the 420 edibles gluten free and kosher for passover.
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
You dont realize corn stalks will cut until you run from the cops through a corn field.
Expect nothing less than me teaching them how to do shots and put condoms on
I was going to say I needed the exercise but now all I can think about is BJs
My work here is done
He asked if I could ever take him seriously, I told him I just like his doggy style.....needless to say I snuck out after an awkward cuddle session... I wont be calling him at 2 am anymore.
I'll miss you, too. On the bright side, a night away from one another might give me a chance to recup seminal fluids.
I am the only person I know ever to have been brought TO the bar in the back of a cop a car. Twice.
Come over. And we'll put iced coffee in the bong.
I'm sorry I was just sleeping on the kitchen floor I'm too dead to think
Oh, don't mind me, that's just my vagina rattling.
Randomize
