If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
Just found a 7-11 receipt for new years eve at 1:30 am apparently we felt the need to buy three jars of pickles and a gallon of milk does this ring any bells?
he's only going to be home for two days, his dick is going to be in me for the whole 48 hours, he doesnt have a choice.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
he just asked me for a tag team. like at least let me get changed out of your roommates clothes from last night first...
I ate her out for so long I might actually shit a vagina
The best part of last night was the women's softball game on the TV at the strip club
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
100 proof captain the only man who can make me strip during a snowstorm
She proposed we share a dildo. Hopefully she was joking.
May the power of my ass compel you!!
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
Dude, he turned on “London Bridge” by Fergie and GAVE ME A LAP DANCE.
You have ten minutes starting with this message to get here. Or I'm putting my clothes back on.
Randomize