I'll hook up with guys I don't even like, as long as they leave early enough the next day.
if that dog is afraid of alcohol then he's no dog of mine
You can duct tape yourself to me so we dont lose you and you dont have to celebrate your birthday alone
Its okay I walked into your house, searched for my wallet in your purse, and took a shot of Tequilia all without eye contact, right?
I take back all the times I've said life was unfair. I'm about to have two trained bartenders for a girlfriend and roommate
Hey have you ever thought about fishing cause I'd like to go fishing but don't know anyone that fishes and I'm gonna cry because. FISHING
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
somebody should make me the poster child for not drinking everclear..
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
Hold me and let me compliment your butt
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
I have so much to do, no motivation, and Harry Potter is on. You KNOW whats taking priority in my life right now
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
