Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
I'm making celebratory pizza rolls. They're a lot like regular pizza rolls, but without the taste of shame.
Lesson learned. Whipped cream will eat through a condom.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
My car smells like beer, you're here in spirit
I put my hydrocodone prescription in my cereal box its like real lucky charms
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i woke up with 5 inch heels locked on my feet and my car keys missing. this is gonna be an interesting walk home
I have already put on my inside pants.
He has great stamina, he knows how to use his tongue, and he's hung like a goddamn Pegasus. I can overlook the man bun.
I threw up in the middle of a bar last night and still managed to get laid! Happy thanksgiving!
I have seen you puke and 5 mins later rock my world. So there is hotness there that average people will never see..
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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