Ikea night.
?
Insert tab A into swedish slot B
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I just fell for a fake 50 dollar bill in a urinal. Fuck pittsburgh
i dont know what it was but it was definately NOT a vagina
is it too much to get a jumbo margarita in a sippy cup right now?
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
So he's compensating for a really small penis. Either that or he's a drug lord.
I can't. I drank 10 years off my life last night. I need to reevaluate. Sorry.
I was THIS CLOSE. But drunk me wanted to play those washboard abs with a spoon, like an actual washboard. Apparently that hurts, so I just squished it out at home alone.
Grandpa just put 6 jello shots on his plate. My aunt tried to take them away; he flipped her off. Living in the retirement home has hardened him.
Last night's dream consisted of you, me, a sauce pan full of cocaine and light sabers. I almost cried when I woke up.
We should have a mid-burrito sex-break, too. Just so we don't get too full all at once
Good point.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Lets just say the phase, What a dick, has a whole new meaning at the urinals.
i out mim tonsoeep
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