I accidentally had sex with my boyfriend's twin last night...and he didn't stop me.
How was it?
Fantastic, but that's not the point.
Why do guys in porn never have boxers on?
better question: why do you always text me when you're watching porn
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
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I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
I wish I had a frozen water bed.
best. idea. ever.
He was pretty out of it. He heard crickets outside, and thought it was the laptop. So he put his ear to it, rubbed the keyboard, and said "tell me your secrets."
He talked me into making a sex video, no worries though, I was wearing sunglasses.
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You and the dog were competed for the water dish
Nothing too major over here lately. Just had a date with an ex-internet porn star turned lawyer. He said: "at my 3rd burning man I taught a workshop on BDSM" and I knew it was going to be a fun night.
I also need to get my life together but instead I just eat spoonfuls of Nutella. We can't win 'em all
she's throwing knives it scares me
update: broke ceiling. glass everywhere
If that guy asks u bout me, I said my name is Jenelle, from CT, I'm a cat behiavor consultant and I'm 29. Back my story up
For one week of my life every time I pull my cock out I want the Jurassic Park theme music to start playing.
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