In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
And when I look at him, I just want him to say "I love you" in between deep thrusts and hard grunts.
Dude, she literally just asked me if her mac'n'cheese makes me horny. I think I found the one.
You face planted into a car door. And somehow didn't drop your burrito.
Just helped a homeless man panhandle outside of Wawa, made him $6.31. Where are you?
I can't even tell you how many rave sticks I tore apart with my teeth last night.
i can't believe he threw up on you. Well thats what you get for being DD. I used the sombreros as a shield!
You know this who 'I show my love by being a total dick' thing is getting old, right?
New Halloween costume idea: Frankenstorm. We have three hours. Make it work.
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
You are one with the wind and sky, bro.
I walked past his mum on the way out and she offered me toast in a napkin "for my travels". Being home from uni is weird.
I guess I asked for the two old strippers numbers at the end of the bar and it turned out to be the bartenders mom and aunt...
Does this cleavage amount say, “Fuck it, I’m over dating, let’s just fuck?”
Randomize
