i hope your v-card owns a pair of floaties
I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
You better get here soon. I'm about to spend $30 on a cactus online
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
New discovery: pineapple flavored vodka. Life made, liver in jeopardy. Graduation t-minus 50 minutes.
Stand up sex. Extremely, extremely difficult. I now know how pointe dancers feel.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
I would have dumped her already but between the 4 hr bjs and our shared love of enjoying thirsty Thursday naked while watching basketball I'd say its the best shot at love ill ever have
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Master Skywalker, there are too many of them. What am I going to do?
Hit on the one in the red shorts. The thirst is strong with this one.
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
Oh my god there are animals here. There are actusal animals trying to get him. A giraffe is trying to get in. A giraffee is trying to get in. Is ridiculouss.
Besides, I don't need any more men there who have seen my tits. #bearwatch2014
How do I let my trainer know I'm only at the gym so I can get in more intense sex positions?
I SHOULD BE TERRIFIED OF HIS DRAGON DICK.
Randomize
