ok so I'm texting you now like I promised instead of drunktexting aaron and telling him how badly I want his cock tonight. aren't you proud?
this is Aaron, hi
He's playing farmville on his phone while puking over the toilet..
the liquor store owner came out from behind the counter and kissed my cheek when he saw that i am back for fall semester
I'm ultimately at thr Shariton to drink and ppssibly puke on fancy shit. Thats my story and Im sticking to it.
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
all i remember is walking in on u shitting and crying listening to shawty get loose. its safe to say this break up has taken a toll on u
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
Girl you know I'm an advocate of debauchery but you might wanna check yoself.
I just took a plan B pill with my preworkout. That's the level I'm on today.
I put on that one song on Titanic so he'd fall asleep. When I was positive he'd passed out in a drunken fit, he outstretches his arms and says "I'm flying, Jack.."
My favorite bra is missing and I smell like beer and bad decisions. This is definitely a sign that hoe mode is activated.
can you come here so we can have really loud sex? the girl upstairs walks so loud i want her to know how it feels
of course
"WHAT IS THIS LESBIAN MADNESS"
Currently standing at the bus stop in just a pillowcase and its fucking snowing
Hey do u remember the time we used my mascara wand as a drink stirer?
Randomize
