i love how people use prayer to talk shit about eachother in a 'holy' manner.
yea pretty sure we followed the trail of your spaghetti-o vomit to find the car
some crying dude holding an empty fifth of burnetts just showed up at our door and asked 'do i live here?'
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
I'm challenging a 70 yr old alcoholic woman who is half my size tonight. Wish me luck
Well idk about you but my nose is all recovered for the weekend.
She took the bride and groom figures and the top layer of their cake and tried to walk out of the reception with it in her purse.
Also, I imagined that his bacne was bubblewrap and that made it much more tolerable
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
I have a rash on my arm from the cat litter. Think the cat will be mad that I peed in its box?
Being sober is no fun. Karaoke and not wearing pants are not socially acceptable things to do anymore and this depresses me.
My brother is so high right now he's eating frozen peas and called them "fucking delightful"
you put your keys in the fridge so you wouldn't forget your yoohoo
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
Sorry about you walking in on the whole nude kinect dancing. The new roomie was drunk and naked and told us he was either over dressed or we were under dressed for the party. And Amy figured it would be easier to join him than it would be to dress him
Randomize