I wish everyone walked around campus with a video of what they did this weekend above their heads.
halfway through eating me out he goes 'oh that reminds me i have to buy fish for good friday'
Welll when you have a beer at 8:30 am you've already decided whaat kind of Sunday it ism
i just realized that im half way to my goal of puking in every single toilet on our floor
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm getting very mixed reviews. One friend told me to stop drinking bc the last 3 times he's heard from me I've either peed my pants, been throwing up, or people have been having sex beside me.
Strangely enough I'm encouraging you to keep drinking for all the same reasons.
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
she smells like cat throw up and cupcakes. i'm trying to focus on the cupcakes but it's really. hard.
its before 9am and ive already had to dip my dick and balls in a glass of milk. probably isnt a good sign for how today is going to go.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found his belly button lint in my hair. Can't say it was worth it.
Want to run by the liquor store later? Tequila Youn should really be in attendance at Party Mountain. No one else could be our spirit animal.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Just realized I'm still chewing the same gum post blow job. This Stride shit really has everlasting flavor. They should totally have an ad campaign based on blow jobs.
All of my friends are hooking up and here I am, the lone asexual, looking for someone to eat these tostitos with me.
His dick is a skeleton key. It fits everywhere.
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