...So a 6 ft tall drag queen in heels I would kill for just told me I have a dunkable ass. I'm confused...but I'll take any compliment I can.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
And then she said "sorry if my vagina smells like fish, it's just active."
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you cried when she wouldn't let you have her bathroom rug.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
Roommate is high and swore off off the diet. Said she wants to make everyone else fat since it'd be easier. She spent today baking 3 dozen brownies for the office tomorrow and is already down to 24.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
Please acknowledge the sock on the door. If not it will be rammed up your ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
These girls just walked into this party as reverse cowgirls... Wearing cowboy clothes all backwards
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
Okay, so is being determined to have my vagina licked by a woman on Valentine's day an acceptable goal?
Cat needed to get out last night. Walking to the door was too much effort so I encouraged (pushed) him to leave via window.
Isn't your room on the second floor?
Randomize