were you the shorter or taller girl out of you two
you were calling yourself Ulickes S. Cunt.
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
Sometimes i look at the biltmore estate and wonder just how small George Vanderbilt's penis was...
Oh and fyi, I've been drinking and about to do free weights. I'll late you know how this goes.
you were fixing your hair in the bathroom mirror and then fell backwards through the locked stall while she was in mid pee and fell on her lap.
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
Teflon bitches. Nothing fucking sticks to this kid, not even a kid. Maury Povitched this shit outta that situation.
I peed in a 7/11 last night. Like literally pretended I pretended I was shopping, looked around, and peed on boxes in the corner. No more tequila
I just said "okay we have 20 minutes to get each other off, ready... Set... Go!" and he picked me up and threw me on the bed. I almost came just from that.
I currently need breakfast in bed, morning sex, and a bourbon and diet coke. Make this happen
Do you think I'm short enough to dress up in a ghost costume and go trick or treating and have people believe that I'm actually a child?
Knowing how to carefully mix my vices has to be the #1 skill I've gotten from pharmacy school
i woke up wearing a life jacket, holding on to a footlong hotdog, and had on a mr. hustle 1995 shirt on
good night
we went book shopping, so yes this relationship is going to be about more than sex
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