OH RELAX, IT WAS PITY SEX.....
All I'm saying, is that being compared to a Muppet is not the end of the world.
There is no point in being painfully greyhound thin if you are then going to dress like it's raining in 1992.
he kind of looks like leonardo dicaprio...in whats eating gilbert grape
wtf, did you fuck a retard?!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Weird we were more concerned with sharing our germs than tag teaming the blow job?
when we went to bed he asked me to hold his penis so he knew i was there for him
There is a nerf war going on here. I just cleaned the blood out of the fridge
I drew a giraffe.. But she did say that bumped that test up from a 39 to a 40. It's the little things.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
Our DD will meet us there. The strippers are sending a limo to pick him up. He promised them New Years Eve massages. Said he would still drive us home.
Woke up, bank account is empty. Sock is still full of blood. Nothing in my pockets but a wireless mic and jenga pieces.
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
And then he tried to convince me that he could wear a condom instead of pants to go out.
Her dad had just brought down their giant American flag for 4th of July and we fucked on it. I have never been more patriotic
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