I just fell asleep with a sandwich in my mouth at Cosi..people definitely saw
Marriage: a sacred union between one man and one woman, and another woman in Argentina.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
cant help it. i get a boner every time that shake weight infomercial comes on
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
He had a 99.9% chance of getting laid...until he started cutting down the frat's volleyball nets with his pocket knife.
Welcome to a new world. May the gods of weed smile upon you as you embark on exploring this new dimension.
I'm disgusted with myself. I feel like I need 10 boxes of Summer's Eve and a baptism.
I definitely fucked a Trump supporter last night but I wouldn't let him fully admit it because then I would've had to leave and his cock and abs were too perfect
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
Sorry you saw my balls. Pregame includes a lot of shaving.
I'm going to start talking to Bill again, he has friends with boats which means we'll get to go on boats.
Randomize
