you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
I understand Curling. That high.
Awww. A guy on the train just took his coat off so his girlfriend could throw up into it. Who says chivalry is dead?
This guys mom bought us a 24 pack and drove me and 8 others to a frat house... Hello moms weekend.
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
Theres a midget tsa agent. Just an observation
Hey do you know who I showed my dick to at the bar last night?
The window painters skipped us. They didn't know what to do with the giant SMOKE WEED in the window. So they just skipped it.
I threw up in a Buffalo Wild Wings and then got a high-five. I really don't understand America
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm convinced he's the patron saint of oral sex
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
Randomize
