I want to buy you liquor! I want to kiss your face.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
Pillow talk just revealed that he originally thought I was 16.
Tonight's trip to the ER was brought to you by, "fork jousting."
God I feel like the rain man of hangovers.
The thing i'm gunna miss the most about college is peeing while brushing my teeth in the shower without being judged. You just can't do that anywhere else
I'm dealing with this like an adult, cupcakes and beer.
Going to the beach. Greeting Sandy with a blunt. Wish us luck!
His penis contains the glue that keeps this relationship together.
For a pair of gay men you destroy a lot of vagina.
Yes I did. Thanks. I was actually an hour and half early. I'm better at public transport than I thought. Guy behind me on the bus is also crying. We compared cry-snot. It was nice in a weird sad way.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
He had a clap on lamp. So every time he was ramming into me, the lights kept turning on and off
Apparently I'm some kind of sexual camel.
Randomize
