help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
I see an opportunity for you to use your nakedness to cure my boredom.
They are providing beer and having a margarita machine. This cannot be passed up.
She just took off her shirt and jumped in the kiddie pool. We're not leaving.
It starts with an S and ends with arah just gave me a bj.
he got mad when I told him his flaccid penis looked like a sleeping kitten
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Last night I was this close to hooking up with someone called "Handjob Pat" dubbed for the time he paid $150 for a handjob in Canada.
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
I wonder if there is a über wall of shame that you are currently on. Like between drivers.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
This morning, I found 5 naked people in Steve's bed with post sex hair, and Steve fully clothed sleeping on the ground.
Randomize
