i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Yes, yes she is. This will teach her not to pull her vibrator out and harass people with it at parties.
I have no valid justification for peeing in your kitchen, but I don't think it's worth breaking up over.
Just blew a perc off the traytable on my flight, spring break has begun!!
She ate the cookie then went to the emergency room. Now her fam is pressing charges. Don't people understand you DON'T steal baked goods from potheads??
Are you absolutely against sleeping in your car? Because i've done that before.
This morning two of his housemate threw confetti over me, started singing and handed me a make shift trophy out of cereal boxes and beer cans that said 'Harry's Virginity' on it. Fucking brilliant!
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
If anyone wants to ring in the new year with gluttony and yoga pants, let me know. As soon as it becomes a socially acceptable hour to drink margaritas, I'm gonna go down on a chimichanga.
I didn't punch him it was just love coming out of my fist
This may be the alcohol talking, but I'm pretty sure I know Spanish now
Nice. Make him jerk off and tape it. Send it to his woman. I also love that you had another skype date
True I am eskimo brothers with every one of my room mates, but it was only two girls. And 9 outta 10 times I was first
we used a blowdryer last night to warm up our left over pizza..it worked perfectly at first..but then the chili powder got into his eyes..
Randomize
