im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
i don't know what the guinness world record is for longest time eating nothing but skittles but i'm going on six days
We're going clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
What will that accomplish?
It will accomplish clubbing with matching soccer jerseys on.
I just found puke in my bra..
He had a cowboy hat I don't know where from and he was trying to lasso a snowman with a dog leash.
Last thing I remember was you straddling a guy in a wheelchair on the dance floor.
Starting drinking whiskey at eight. Already had ten girls looking up my kilt to make sure I'm wearing it right.
Two words. Shotgunning Cognac.
This has already gotten way out of hand
Hate to say it and even though I definitely have a biased opinion but I'm surprised your not, sleeping with anyone else. Good personality, charisma and amazing in the sack.
Feel free to use me as a reference.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Yeah I figured you were blackout when you were Shakira dancing on the floor.
My vag hurts but I feel vindicated
That is an interesting emotion combo
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
i have paint on my face i'm missing my earrings, there's a bag of rice in my room, and i have a purse full of monopoly pieces
Randomize
