he kept kneeing me like he was playing footsies... only then i realized it was his dick.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
I feel like none of my dresses scream slut the way I'd like them to
I wish I could sell my textbooks directly to my drug dealer and cut out the middle man
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She fell down the stairs and hit her head on the concrete. Then she stood up, flashed us and stumbled away. I forgot to get her number..
After much deliberation I've decided to name my penis "Arthur", hope your mom's surgery goes well.
i was playing the convince him im sober game through texting. i spelled most of the words right. i hope.
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I need to stop treating my body like that of a Vegas hooker on vacation in Ibiza
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This guy is walking around with a deer head on. Honestly what the fuck
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
Her alarm in the morning was Best Day Ever from Spongebob. I'm have lots of conflicting feelings right now...
Listen, if I miss the flight to Vegas because she's still rimming my ass, it will have been worth it.
As a paramedic, it's completely unacceptable to black out on a monday. I cant handle 3 dollar shot night.
See I just want a dick that I don`t have to deal with or talk to unless it is inside me. Is that so much to ask for?
Randomize