Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
moral of the story: I'm going to stab everyone
Just turned rock'em sock'em robots with my little cousin into a drinking game. Im drinking bourbon hes drinking hot chocolate.
I don't want to smoke with her when she's on adderall. She carved her pumpkin for four hours & didn't say a word.
This is one of those times where I really wish my vagina could tell me what happened last night.
PS August 29 of last year was when you ran over my foot. Facebook just reminded me.
I have a weapon and I'm not blacked out. Good as gold
If they weren't representing Obama and the White House, they definitely would've punched me in the face.
My unemployment came through so I'd like to thank the taxpayers of Utah in advance for my level of intoxication this weekend
Invite that kid who wants to become a priest. I WANT ON.
this hangover isn't hhappening. im not letting it
its winning. its definitely happening
Speaking of mom and dad and Halloween... Mom bought a size small slutty nurse outfit last night. So yeah, they're getting hammered
The fact that I can now puke rainbows on snapchat makes my life that much better
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Mom says you're allowed to come home if you replace the towels. I don't want to know why.
Randomize
