Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
took acid and went on safebus. all the lights were off except the adds. swear to god it was a submarine
you would think someone who fights for his country could fight to last longer than 2 minutes
Thanks for the birthday present, i had so much fun playing with it
Are you talking about my vagina?
Are we hungover?
I got a lapdance from a gay guy in red uggs and spandex shorts with reindeer antlers on. And I don't remember it. Hungover does not even cover it.
Apparently when the cops arrived I was standing over him in the bathroom yelling, get the fuck up you piece of shit. Beer still in hand.
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
YOU WILL DIE AND I WILL CARVE 'I TOLD YOU SO' ON YOUR HEADSTONE
Worse. He's Mormon. At least a gay guy will go get drinks with me.
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
I feel like your boyfriend deserves to know that you're a lesbian.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
Randomize