My Yahoo Answers account was suspended. Apparently I answered "I like chicks who do anal" to over 100 questions last night.
His little brother just walked in, asked me if I'd blown his brother yet and then announced that he and his friends were going to play outside so we could play too.
The barista asked if I wanted my drink wet or dry, but all that came to mind was farts. You have ruined me.
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
Did you just reference Ludacris during my possible pregnancy scare of 2012?!
Just found a g string in our driveway, wtf happened this weekend?
there's fuck elsewhere to go, I'll be there with 8 lbs of bronzer on my tits
Can I steal her, take her home, and feed her only vodka?
I'm pretty sure I'm the first person in the history of this college to rollerblade their walk of shame.
Oh no. Not her. Her personality clashes with mine in ways that would make me wanna beat myself with a stick.
Sexual Frustration City, population: Me.
I just tried to give a picture of a dude a blowjob. through my computer screen. I was leaning forward with my mouth open and everything so WALK AWAY
My apartment is also really close to an alcohol rehab in case I get out of hand
I just used my dick as to measure where my desk would go because I don't have a tape measure or a ruler.
He literally knows my vagina better then I do.
I woke up to an email from expedia confirming my flight to hong kong
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