these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
Microwave minutes are longer than normal minutes.
I feel I need to conquer him. He's six ft eight and 265lbs. Its like the mount Everest of sex.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
Member that time when we got super drunk and had fun and fell in love
I remember it like it was tomorrow.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Do you congratulate someone for having bigger tits, or is that a no no?
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
It's 7am. I'm sitting on the curb in last nights clothes with a nose bleed and no idea how to get home. Low moment I feel.
i mean ive seen your left buttcheek how much more bro can this get
THERE HAS BEEN GRANDTHEFT IN THE HOUSE. SOMEONE STOLE THE BABYWIPES AND YOU NEED TO BUY MORE BEFORE WE LET YOU IN. oh and you have to take two shots before we'll let you in. with no chaser.
Randomize
