roommate just walked in on us. two and a half times. the half, she just knocked, sighed, and walked away.
Why are all the lights on in my house? Every single one. Someone should turn them off but I'm the only one here and I'm sure as hell not doin it.
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
I just found a beer pong ball in my mail box. I think its a sign
She's the only person who can pull off turning an outdoor patio heater tower into a stripper pole.
Someone asked me what I was drinking, I was drinking rum, but I was also eating starbursts so i told them "daiquiris"
My day may involve a drug pinata. I LOVE MY LIFE.
We fucked to showtunes. Never going out with a theatre major ever again.
You are in a fancy European city. The best way to truly experience the city is through Tinder
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
He totally just went there for sex cuz he slept in her roommates bed the rest of the night after they were done...
pure definition of booty call.
I'm wearing a sports bra. Of course I'm not getting laid tonight.
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
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