O.A.R does not stand for Old Recycled Abortions.
i talked to you about this last night, and you kept saying "he wants yo pusssaayyyyyy"
Using the ceiling fan to slice the hotdogs in mid-air can only be contributed to our liberal use of 1800.
I'm bringing a flask to the test on friday. If I'm gonna fail at least I can enjoy the experience
It's okay, I climbed on the roof of the bar to get my shoe back. This may become a Saturday tradition. I'll keep you updated
I obviously couldn't but this on your fbook wall. I would get judge. I would willingly get tbagged by him. You can quote me on that.
Drunk me forgot I'm not an 18yr old raver anymore. Adult me is now in pain.
Get your ass over here, we're drinking Patron and watching My Little Pony. Patron and Ponies, do you copy?!
So I'm thinking about sending him some "sorry I almost peed on your computer" cookies. Thoughts?
Will it be a clothes optional week when I get there? I have an amazing outfit of tattoos and toenail polish planned.
btw telling the cab driver, that took you to your booty call that is now returning your wallet that you left in his cab, that you want to hug him is awkward
things were going awesome until jimmy put out a cigarette in the everclear.
Well I'm missing half a toenail if that's any indication of my night
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
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