I'll tell you what, we couldn't have asked for better binge-drinking weather.
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
how many past hook-ups can i invite to go bar hopping with me for my b-day before it becomes a bad idea?
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
I got home and laid by the toilet and then alexa laid in the bathtub and sang the preamble while kayla held my hair
Nothing like grinding all night with a hot ethnic guy dressed as a clown to help conquer your phobia. Halloween is fucked up.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I should come with a disclaimer that reads "bad at relationships and defensive when confronted about it"
or maybe "WARNING: picks fights when bored"
I can't ever look his wife in the eye again. She will see right through my soul to his dick pic.
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I should get an "I gave blood today" type of sticker, but instead it would say "I went balls deep today"
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
You're a FUCKING ASSHOLE. Love mom
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