marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
check it out our google latitudes are spooning
I think the best way to start out any day is to watch 80's music videos. It's like visual wheaties.
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
So, during a 20 minute shower I spent 19 minutes spinning in circles and 1 minute licking the wall, and it was better than sex. I can't wait to do X again.
oh no, im for sure still drunk. i wana eat evrything in the fancy feast commercial... everything
Are you really this nice or are you just trying to get in my pants?
Both?
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
I just ate beer and cupcakes for breakfast.... maybe this fourth of july won't be so bad
I've been there a week.. I'd rather all my coworkers not know that I'm already sleeping with my boss.
She called and said her prescription was refilled. I guess we are dating again.
Leave it to me to sleep w a guy who gets poison ivy on his dick
Can I just buy you sex toys as a wedding gift? Bc I’m here for that and you
Don't forget my pants whenever you come over, otherwise we can't get in.
If I don’t find a quality dick soon I’m going to beg the neighbor for another threesome with her and her husband. It’s like Covid killed all the quality penis Vegas normally has
Randomize
