3 complete strangers have joyously high-fived me on campus today. Tell me why, starting after jager bomb #4.
just saw a girl with a lower back tattoo of the boondock saints prayer.. i will marry her
This is worse that I thought. He's playing violin for me.
A 300 lb dude in a sundress yelling bible verses while wearing a raggedy anne wig is just as funny as I thought it would be. Thank you san francisco.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Ya. I was the definition of a shit show. I woke up outside my door when my alarm went off
Rub those nipples and moan like a platypus.
Jesus, are you hammered?
Hammered for that juicy ass. I'll bring the straws.
Well i think matt shit his pants so ill mark that as a W
Just an FYI if we break up I'm going to sleep with your cousin or who ever my dealer is.
I forgot how weird my hair bleaches and now I'm a calico
You can wake up to my rainbow of failure
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dinner at my parents is vodka, lemonade, cheese ad crackers. Why would I leave?
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
I know. It was just so disappointing. I almost made it. And now the "when's the last time you peed your pants" clock has restarted. Lol
You were peeing off the rooftop and told everyone sometimes you just gotta go
And our sex soundtracks thus far have been metal and Star Wars
Once my new license was put into my hand, a light from the heavens shined down and pauly D's voice was in my mind saying ohh yeaaah 21 yeaaah
Randomize