so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I mean a good dj is a huge turn on
your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
i don't have fun when you have fun. i have embarrassment, fear, and significantly less cash in my wallet.
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Oh I also wanted to thank you for leaving your list of porn sites on the coffee table. Very entertaining.
I'm cooking a can of baked beans on the baseboard heater. It is too early in the semester to be this poor.
I have your dog in a headlock. Se wants my mushrooms.
I need Jameson.
Yea? How do you think I feel? Your job during the delivery is to keep that flask ready. The moment our kid pops out, I'm taking a shot.
Good, I would never sleep with your boyfriend , or send you an edible arangment
It's one am and you're asking me if you should buy a plane ticket for a booty call.
I woke up with sticky red stuff all over my sheets, face, and chest. Apparently after I blacked out I thought eating ribs in bed was a good idea
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
shots, cocks, socks. bingo
Randomize
