Now hope fervently that she'll do it quick and cheap, just the way i like it
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
kevin brought a 6ft brunette runway model with him tonight. Now, im not sure what the fuck the color of the " i get it, its over, Im ugly" flag is.... but i'll wave it.
Last night was proof dads should hug their daughters more
Yeah, I just met her and we got arrested together. I think it was a good bonding experience.
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
I don't really see how asking you not to cum on my face or hair makes me high maintenance
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
Just got assigned a beer bong as hw in fluids to demonstrate the inverse of pascals principle. I love this prof
And the cops are back. At least my pants are on this time
Had a dream I cut my own dick off. That's it I gotta see a doctor...
Umm
Exactly.
I tried to light my cup as a bong. I'm done drinking
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
Instead of.being an intelligent and mature adult and dealing with my feelings I chose to get hammered and fuck flounder
Eh it happens
Randomize
