I only kidnapped one of them. chill
I just hatefucked a Bush administration appointee. Now having celebratory mimosas.
HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
just got a hand job during a movie in class today is gonna be great!
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he turned the pretty ricky playlist on. its about to go down.
tell that swedish kid i didnt take his shotgun. he GAVE it to me.
We have a tower of vodka coming. OF VODKA
I shouldn't have to thank you for taking off your captain hat off before we had sex
stuck in traffic next to occupy boston. smells like patchouli and unshaven pubes
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
He took getting"shit in your neighbors hot tub drunk" way to literally
Her boyfriend caught us fucking and said "cool you're cheating too" and left.
You live a charmed life.
For thanksgving we are only drinking wild turkey for the next 24hrs time to strap your balls back on and maybe a helmet
Ps we bought 8 pellet guns just now
my mom just said "if you had sex with someone you don't really like I'm going to be so mad at you" HOW DOES EVERYBODY KNOW
I have an important idea to tell you when I'm sober about a cat scratching my nose once and what it taught me. DONT LET ME FORGET.
Randomize