There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
Can you really blame Steve Phillips? He went to Michigan. Plowing fat girls is a 100-level course there.
"Not only do I bring a guy back to my hotel room....But I bring one back for my friend who's passed out drunk. Now that's what we call BESTfriends"
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's only 11:30 and she's already making friends with the homeless...
She sucked my dick while i watched james bond. And they say marriage sucks
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
I have to bobbypin his pubes for us to have sex. The other day he wanted me to braid them.
Bad idea to be in a car concussed. I just described his dick as an elevator. I think i meant escalator, i dont know
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
It's now officially the Christmas season, so I have no shame in drinking evernog.
We shared a dick. We're practically sisters!
Morning! Got your 3am VM to remind you to get up for spin class and also confirm you were not murdered by the sketchy guy at brunch yesterday. So this is your literal and metaphorical wake up call.
He's really cute...He stopped talking to me because i pulled my skirt up and peed in a demi plie position...
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