Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
i got excepted to unl lol
You mean "accepted".
I guess on the plus side everyone really, really enjoyed my nipple clamps
So it turns out my dad calls his penis "John" which means he either named me after his penis or his penis after me
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He just yelled in the bar, "So I stuck it in two girls butts, why are you bringing that up now?"
Im only slightly posetive that left over guacamole and wine are unacceptable for breakfast at 6.30 am
We're in the emergency room. He concussed himself trying to pop all the bubbles on my "one bubble a day" wall calender with his face.
Dad had me doing shots of chocolate mint Everclear last night. I've never felt closer to him.
I feel like I deserve an award for facing my fear of penises in my face.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called me at 3 am laughing like an idiot. Apparently you consider breaking out of the hospital to be a lifetime achievement.
IM WEARING A FLAG
So that's a no to the clothes then
FLAG
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Where's the chopping off someone's balls emoji
how do I say, without sounding slutty... That I can take a dick?
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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