I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
I coulnt tell if he was cumming or if I was throwing up
Clearly, I'm already going to hell, so there's no point in trying anymore.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Did I happen to mention where i left my keys when I drunk dialed you last night
I don't know if I have the sustained energy level for partying hard
Not a choice. You are mistaking my comments as options. My statements are facts. This is what is happening.
On a scale of your daily life to smuggling crack into the DR, how illegal is it?
Would you even take no as an answer? I have a feeling you see it more as a challenge.
While looking for socks, I found my mothers sex toy box. Dear god I finally understand where my kinkiness comes from.
Well, my breasts are swollen and I cried about the Iditarod. But I say PMS until proven pregnant.
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
pesky things like morals, self-preservation and cowardice are not needed. overkill is nothing but a word. there will be blood.
Plus you get to call him out on being a dick. It's more satisfying than ever sex I've ever had.
If my one night stand asked me to move in with him right after does it still count as a one nighter?
im mourning your vaginas lack of frictional upkeep
Randomize
